On being a mom, celebrations and 33 Weeks

mom circa May 1979, pregnant with me and headed to the hospital. talk about a blessing, my mom is amazing!

At the risk of sounding like a broken record, I’m going to say it one more time.  I’m just so grateful to be a mom.  I feel so thankful for the opportunity to raise-up our little ones alongside Alex.  I sure love these kiddos and the {growing} family that we’ve created.

happy kiddos + one tired but very content mama = joy

I’m also so thankful to be surrounded by so many wonderful women who support and encourage me along this journey of motherhood.  Over Mother’s Day weekend I spent time away with my mom, four Aunties and four cousins.  It was a wonderful girl’s weekend of celebration – weddings, birthdays and baby – oh what fun we had.  My trip away was also my last *hurrah* before baby as my doctor has rather strongly insisted that I stick close to home.

Monday, on the heels of Mother’s Day I had a doctor’s appointment and ultrasound to see how baby Coco is doing.  Thankfully baby is looking good and we’re giving praises for placentas that move and for baby’s who are head-down!  Alex and my mom were there for the ultrasound and it was pretty darn impressive to hear Alex giving the ultrasound narrative… “there’s the heart, see the eyes, that’s her profile, oh and that’s a hand….”  He claims not to be into all this baby stuff, but he certainly knows his stuff.

While it’s probably too early to begin counting down to an actual birth day, there’s no doubt that this sweet little baby is going to be here soon.  This means it’s time to actually start preparing for baby and I certainly have plenty of organizing, sorting and baby-related laundry to keep me busy for a while.  For good measure, I’ll also probably move some furniture around the house, putter around the garden, plant and re-plant a handful of poor plants and re-arrange my random knickknacks for the two hundredth time.  Nesting sounds like pure heaven for this homebody.  I’m also hoping to sneak in a dinner date with Alex, a few lunch and coffee dates with friends and plan on taking each kiddo out for some solo time with mommy.  Sounds like fun doesn’t it?

At this stage of the game I’m all about wearing things without a fitted waistband.  Helllooo skirts!  It took me long enough to realize, but my jeans and really anything else with a restrictive waistband was making me grumpy.  My belly is low, low, low this time.  Not sure if it’s a girl thing or a fourth-pregnancy thing, but it’s made for some adventures when getting dressed.  And yes, I realize that if this is my biggest complaint I shouldn’t be complaining at all because in all reality I feel pretty darn great at this stage of the game.

So for now we wait, we dream and all five of us spend way too much time staring at my belly as baby Coco dances and wiggles around.  It’s safe to say we’re already smitten.

Henry

Dear Henry,

Today we celebrate you.  As our first baby it seems fitting that your birthday and mother’s day fall close on the calendar for eight years ago we embarked on this crazy journey together.  I had big dreams and plans about what it would like to be a parent.  To be a mother to you, my first-born son.

Of course it’s completely different.  More often than not though, it’s better than what I dreamed.  We certainly have our moments, but somewhere in the middle we’ve taught each other a lifetime of lessons on extending and receiving grace.

Sometimes I wonder where that perfect mother, the mother who existed only in my dreams, went.   For I am far from perfect.

Sometimes I wonder how you and I can be so completely different and yet so very much the same.

I also never imagined how charming and loving you would be.  It is funny, being the mother of a boy like you, knowing that you operate best moving at full speed, talking always, knowing everything, and yet at same time you are so empathetic, understanding and always wearing your feelings on your sleeve.

It catches me at odd moments, just how amazing I find you to be.  Already, at only eight you are becoming a grown-up kind of handsome.  And yet almost daily I still catch glimpses of the little boy within.  I wish I could freeze those moments in time.

You are a wonder to watch in action.  You are a natural athlete, I’m not sure if you realize this yet.  You are a gifted people person – a social butterfly if you will – but this gift also brings you trouble.  Occasionally your teacher checks in with us, to mention that you are talking out of turn too often {and too loudly}, or that you are having trouble minding your own business.  And yet in the same note she can’t help but mention how delightful you are to have in class.  This is the paradox of you sweet boy.

Somehow you have managed to create a perfect storm for mothering.

You balance strength with weakness.  You are driven and determined and yet you are restless.  You are competitive and you are compassionate.  You are disagreeable, and then pleasing.  You are a mystery and yet I understand you completely.  I feel the same swing as a mother; one moment I’m teetering on the edge of “I’ve got this” and next I’m loosing my mind.

One thing is certain, I love you sweet Henry.  I’m so thankful for you, for all that makes you, you.  Your laughter, the pure joy, zest and wonder that you bring to this life.  I love you.

Happy Birthday sweet boy!  We are so thrilled to celebrate eight year-old YOU.

I want to give a special shout-out to Kristen. She has a way with words, and has served as a blessing and inspiration on raising-up boys.

Disneyland

We did it.

Feeling like we should have one last hurrah before baby comes we packed up our family of five and went to Disneyland.

Oddly enough my vote for Maui was not taken seriously.

Our kiddos have been blessed to go on lots of vacations as they’ve grown up.  However during this vacation we realized that our boys have also missed out on lots of vacation norms.  Like flying.  Staying in a hotel.  Little things like that.  We are vacation road warriors, and don’t think twice about driving 9 hours to our destination.  That way we can pack our car to the gills and be as loud as we’d like without bothering anyone else.  William was pretty darn confused about the whole rental car thing, and *our new house.*

Let’s play *can you spot the cowboy hat?*

See baby Coco…you’ve already been to Disneyland.  And the beach.  ;)

We had the best time.  Six full days together, just the five of us.  It was so much fun to play and laugh and see where each day led us.  And while our exhausted troopers could have used every excuse in the book for meltdowns, they were fantastic.   We were on the go from our 7am wake-up until we returned to our room around 9pm and once until 10:30pm!

On Tuesday my brother Jimmy joined us {which was apparently the same day we gave the camera a break?}  What a treat it was to spend the day with my brother and to watch him interact with his adoring nephews.

Wednesday we decided that three days at the Happiest Place on Earth was enough and called it a beach day.  We headed to Malibu and spent the day playing in the sand, eating a tailgate picnic, catching up with my cousin Jessica and stopping at In-And-Out for dinner.  Yum.

Yes, Disneyland was cliché.  It was overstimulating.  We probably could have just flown the commuter flight from our hometown to Seattle and back and called it a day.  {Seriously, that was probably a top highlight for the boys.  That and a pack of gum they split.}  I also felt like I should make a tater tot casserole when we got home.

But for all of those silly things, it was just right.  I’m so thankful for Alex who carefully planned every detail for our family.  And I can’t think of anything better than watching my loves play and laugh and be thrilled together.  Yay for family vacations!

A couple of Disney tips if you are headed that direction in the near future:

1.  If you are traveling with multiple little ones bring your biggest double stroller.  We might have gotten some funny looks at the airport, but there is no way we could have successfully done this trip without our trusty double bob stroller.  Even Henry would collapse into it on occasion.  It was the perfect place for the little ones to nap or just pull down the shade and take a break if it became too much.

2.  Bring your own snacks and water into the park.  We ate our lunch and dinners at the park {or right outside} but I was so thankful to have plenty of granola bars, raisins, water bottles, etc. to pass out throughout the day.  Not only did it save money but we were able to avoid standing in yet another line.

3.  Speaking of lines, we pulled the special needs card.  We’ve never, ever done this {quite honestly we try to avoid doing this at all costs} but this felt like the right time to do it.  I’m not sure if this is taboo to say or not, but hopefully this information will help another family out.  When we first got to Disney we checked in at city hall and received a pass that allowed us to cut to the front of almost every line and keep our stroller with us the entire time – right up until we boarded the ride.  Now before you start cursing my name, know that this was huge for Charlie.  {And let’s be honest, his very pregnant mama too.}  I’m pretty sure it allowed him to keep pace with the rest of us and avoid the way over-crowded and over-stimulating lines that might have led to some meltdowns.

4.  Go slow.  We spent 1 1/2 days in the Disney park and 1 1/2 days in California Adventure.  We didn’t see it all.  We didn’t go on every ride.  But by doing this our boys never felt rushed and we were simply able to enjoy what we did see.

5.  Take the ART shuttle to the park if you are staying off-resort.  It’s way easier {and cheaper} than parking and again, another unexpected highlight for our boys was riding the *bus.*

P.S. I have no idea why sometimes pictures post and why other times they don’t.  I’ve even noticed that some text occasionally gets left out.  I’m just not tech savvy enough to understand…but I’ll do my best to fix things as problems arise.

Spring Break

We did it!  Spring Break 2013 was a hit.  There was nothing better than having the boys home for a week.  When all was said and done I was pretty bummed to head back into our school routine.  If anything I’m looking forward even more to summer.  And yes, this might be the hormones talking since summer = home all day long with three busy boys + one newborn.

I’m such a homebody at heart.  To me there is nothing better than puttering around the house, digging around the garden, baking something each day and just being with my kiddos.  Allowing our days to be determined not by a schedule, {pick-up! drop-off! practice!} but by our own rhythm.  I also love watching the relationships between each brother grow.  Of course this also comes with our fair share of hurt feelings and disagreements.  Yet sometimes its as if I can actually see the threads of brotherhood actually weaving in and out of each interaction.  I’m certain that this is yet another reason I’m so insistent on always circling the wagons.  Keeping playdates to a minimum and just letting my boys discover their days together – as brothers.

This week we are back at it.  Yesterday I counted and I loaded and unloaded and buckled the kids into the car seven times.  {Truthfully I just buckle William and Henry helps with Charlie but I did herd and coral the kids all SEVEN times.}

Yes, I realize how silly I am.  Always wishing for something else.  Like for my sanity.  One less errand.  Or a sudden burst of energy.  Too much to ask?  Maybe.

What to Expect Winner!

Congratulations to Shirley!  Shoot me an e-mail with your mailing address and I’ll have all three What to Expect Books mailed out to you.

27 weeks and a What to Expect giveaway

In my mind I’m on top of things and taking belly shots weekly.  Or at least monthly.  Let’s just settle for a six, almost seven week up-date, okay?

Note to self, it’s time to stop wearing short cardigans, that is unless I’m trying to channel Tommy Boy.

Ironically, not one darn maternity piece of clothing seems to fit right this time around and it just seems too darn soon to be constantly tugging at my pants.

Wasn’t there an entire Seinfeld episode about a white shirt with ruffles?  This looked cute in real life.  Alex said so.  Smart guy right?

Anyhoo.

I’m just getting a taste of third trimester fatigue while clinging to one last week of second trimester bliss.  Wardrobe complaints aside, I feel great {exhausted, but great}, which I’m thankful for.  I’m healthy and so is baby and you certainly can’t ask for more than that.

We’ve been pushing the pedal to the metal around here and I’m trying to stay motivated.  We still have a pretty long to-do list before baby arrives.  A big part of our to-do list obviously involves getting ready for baby.  {No, it’s not all about my random nesting projects like cleaning out the garage or picking out exterior paint colors…}  It might not make any sense, but Alex and I sort of feel like a first-time parents our fourth time around.  Everything feels different.  We’re out of “baby-mode.”  All of our baby gear is supposedly out-of-date and to tell you the truth I don’t remember any of the basics.

Maybe it’s like riding a bike?

Just in case crossing our fingers doesn’t work out I’m thankful to have some new reading material to help along the way.  New copies of What to Expect When You’re Expecting and What to Expect the First Year are now sitting on my nightstand and I’ve been referencing them frequently.

You would think that at this stage of the game I already have my fair share of pregnancy and baby-related reading materials.  I do, but they’re all out of date so I appreciated the fresh tone of the current What to Expect book.  And yes, while not that much has changed {clearly women have been having babies forever} there are still plenty of new tips and ideas and it’s always nice to be familiar with the up-to-date medical information, and advice.

Guess what?  The team at What to Expect.com has given me three books to giveaway.  One lucky reader will receive a copy of What to Expect Before You’re Expecting, What to Expect When You’re Expecting and What to Expect the First Year.

Maybe you’re a first-time mom, or like me this isn’t your first rodeo, but could use a refresher course.  Or maybe you know someone who is expecting…these books would certainly be a welcome gift.  To enter this giveaway simply leave a comment.  And go check out What to Expect.com, it’s a great online resource for new, seasoned and expecting parents.

This giveaway will end on Friday, April 12th at 5pm PST.

Plans for Spring Break.

It’s officially spring break and I guess you could say that our official plan is to not have a plan.

We have nothing major on the calendar beyond a mini-baseball camp for Henry and I can’t wait.  No pre-school.  No elementary school.  No horse-back riding lessons.  No piano lessons.  No little league practice.  No speech therapy.  And while a teeny-tiny part of me wants to panic, the rest of me is super excited.

umm…could somebody please tell me where my seven year-old went?

See this week I have plans to become *that* mom.  I have this little dream of being the mom who drops her kiddos off somewhere while wearing her jammies.  Strange I know, but my kiddos have always been little and required a parent to walk them to their classroom or practice.  Now that Henry is in second grade I can drop and go…so this week that’s just what I plan to do.  Just once.  At baseball camp.  And then I envision heading home with the littles and lounging around drinking coffee and doing puzzles.  Or something like that.

Yes, I dream big.

You see, the rest of the time I’ve become *that* mom.  And ironically, while we have done our best to push back, say no and limit our schedules, eventually you just do reach that next stage when it’s time to add a lesson here or activity there.  Of course this also translates to lots of snacks on the go, more time in the car and less time at home.  The kids adapted easily, however this homebody is still adapting.  Without hesitation I’d say William has earned his little brother stripes.  He is a trooper.  I’ve also made a note to make sure that baby girl’s car seat is pretty plush because she is going to be a gal on-the-go from the get-go.

So this week we’re saying yes to saying no.  We’re sticking close to home and making our own adventures.  We’re boldly wearing our jammies well into the morning. {maybe just yoga pants? see I’m chickening out already.}

Happy Day

Our Easter weekend was the perfect combination of family, fun, work, play and celebration.  This Easter was a first for us – we were on our own – just our little family of five.  It felt both exciting and strange.  Growing up it wasn’t a real holiday without a large gathering of family members.  I have to admit a part of me still feels the same way and I realize that now Alex and the kids do too.  At the same time I knew that this Easter weekend was a wonderful opportunity for our little family to forge ahead and establish our own traditions.  We read about the death and resurrection of Jesus from the Jesus Storybook Bible.  We dyed eggs, held our own egg hunt.  We dressed up and went to church.  Together we proclaimed that He is Risen!  And thankfully, Grammy and Gigi dropped by for a visit and my brother Andy came over for Easter dinner.  Which pretty much sealed the deal – it was indeed an official holiday in the eyes of my children.  We had company.  Whew.

Easter is one of my favorites though I’m certain I probably say something pretty similar at Thanksgiving and Christmas.  During this season of Lent we are called to feel, to remember the weight of the sacrifice that our Lord made for us.  And yet all too often instead of turning my focus to Him I easily turn that focus inward.  The heaviness of my sin, my selfishness and my pride weigh heavily on me.  Yet because of the sacrifice and resurrection of our Lord Jesus – because of His great love for us – I’m able to repent of all these burdens and sins and be forgiven.  And just as He lives we too are once again made new.

Again and again.

Oh happy day!

He is risen.

Alleluia!