A double rainbow.

Tonight we saw a double rainbow.

My mom called and told me to look outside.

Libby, there’s a double rainbow!  You have to go and look RIGHT NOW.  It’s a double rainbow!

Of course I asked her if she had seen the video.  You know what I’m talking about right?

Naturally I had to tell my brothers and a couple of friends about our good fortune.  This was a double rainbow man.  They each asked me; What does it mean?  I have no idea.  It was so intense…

If I’m being totally honest, I needed to see a double rainbow.  Today I was feeling a bit defeated and yes, the rainbows cheered me up.  Again, more proof that I’m a simple gal.  I’m a sucker for anything that falls under the whole *promises and hope* umbrella.

I’ve been frustrated with my health, which has a tendency to spill over into other areas of life.  Then there are the many silly thoughts about raising up our children swirling through my head.  Thoughts I wasn’t giving any weight, but in the end do hold true.  Like raising a child with Down syndrome can be hard.  Even when he might be your easiest child.  Clear as mud right?

To top it all off, it seems as though I’ve taken a summer vacation from Jesus.  Why does this happen so easily?  Prayers happen while falling asleep and the only quiet time around here is while I’m sleeping.

We live a good life and I thank God each and every day for our blessings.  But there are still hardships we endure.  Which sounds so silly, because yes I know that there are orphans, and people living in mud huts and well, you get the idea.

We all have our stuff.  Areas in life that are just hard.  Sometimes we do suffer.  Or we might just be going through a rough patch.  But how do we cope during these times if we don’t have a faith and a support system of family and friends to support and encourage?  What happens when we pretend that everything is all double rainbows all the time?

I honestly believe that during these trials – moments in life when we find ourselves out in the wilderness – are the best opportunities to encounter God.  However we live in a culture where we cannot suffer and those that do must do it quietly.  Heaven forbid we make others uncomfortable with our suffering.

Instead we are quick to share the news of our many blessings and the abundance that God has given us.  We are quick to praise our God for healing us, bringing us joy and easing our pain.  I’m just as guilty as the next guy.

However, during the bumpy patches of life, when we are truly suffering, we question His presence.   We question Him in general.  We’re upset over unanswered prayers.  We question why our child has a disability.  Quite frankly we wonder how He could allow this to happen.

And yet I’ve learned the most about God’s love in a place of suffering and brokeness.  In the first months and years after Charlie was born my faith grew and has never been stronger.  I’ve found that it is at the shadow of the cross – the place of ultimate suffering – where God’s love for the world is made clear.  Still, I would never choose the wilderness.

Yet when life is all double rainbows I’m not always seeking Him.  Of course I give thanks and blessing for his goodness and beauty along the way, but it just isn’t the same.

Only through His grace will I find my way.

*****************************

Wow.  That just about wraps up Monday’s *Deep Thoughts by Libby* lecture.  Proof that you can indeed write about a double rainbow and Jesus all in the same post.

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4 thoughts on “A double rainbow.

  1. I could have written this post myself my friend! We saw a rainbow at Taylor’s game the other night and I teared up! Seriously! And it is HARD raising a child with a disability even if they are the easiest child. No one understands that more than those os us walking in your shoes. Makes me want to reach out and hug you tight! Know you aren’t alone and we both need to remember this is not our home. We have a heavenly home waiting for us! XO

  2. Some days are just harder than others. I feel like I can’t always pinpoint what makes it more difficult, it just *is*. Yes, it could always be worse. But a few days with things looking up would be nice, too.

    I’ll be praying for an awesome day for you!

  3. Um, okay, I hadn’t seen the double rainbow video until just now, after reading your post. That guy was smoking something serious, it seems…

    Anyway…

    I know what you mean. I’m slugging through it right now, horribly. Not even a single rainbow for me today, or for the foreseeable future I’m afraid.

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